greentea-and-sherbert: onafinespringevening: teratomarty: cakemeister: tentaspy-is-here-for-all-of-you: synnesai: striderbutt: rainbowtasticsquid: douchetier: trophywifematerial: OH MY GOD IM CRYING it’s back how did he even… ? i dont even know anymore literally burst out laughing omfg oh my god jesus that is so cute Reblogging for Jess and Duchess: this is...
Not a wallet: "Dearie" →
notawallet: The snow started to melt from the hot flesh of her body. Her ankles had snapped on impact which caused her legs to buckle under her torso. Blood was oozing out of her; like pus from a boil. Her back was infectious and discoloured. Barely recognisable. Funny how nine pieces of fine cotton thread…
swamperts asked: ☼ ❄ <3
The White Moon Family: Good Morning! :D →
thewhitemoonfamily: How is everyone doing? I was just thinking this morning for some reason about Memoirs of a Geisha. I think of something random every day when I wake up and it makes me ponder that subject. Most people, when I tell them I want to study abroad in Japan, give me a very stereotypical answer. “Oh… pallassoteria: Thank you!!!!! Exactly how I feel.
I thought I should make a deep and personal ask...
✞ Your religious Views?
✿ Relationship with your father?
❀ Relationship with your mother?
✩ Who is your most loved person?
☂ What is your sexuality?
☼ Who makes you the happiest?
❄ What calms you down when you're upset?
♥ Have you ever fallen in love?
✖ Had your heart broken?
☛ Have you been betrayed in the past? How?
☁ Who do you miss the most?
✌ Share a secret?
Woman: Can I have birth control?
Woman: I got pregnant because I didn't have birth control and I don't want the fetus. Can I have an abortion?
Woman: I gave birth to my child but since I wasn't expecting it, I can't afford daycare. Can I have help paying for it?
Woman: Well, why can't I have birth control?
Government: Because. Sex isn't for recreation. It's for procreation.
Woman: But it can help regulate my period and benefit me in other ways.
Government: Too bad.
Man: For no reason other than for recreational sex, may I have birth control?
Government: Do you have a penis?
Man: YES, YES I DO!!
Government: WELL HOWDY, VALID CITIZEN. You can buy condoms by the dozens. Here, here's a pack of special condom for "His Pleasure." Oooh, these come in different colours and flavours. Here, try these. They have ribs on them. And this one glows in the dark!! LOL OMG DICK LIGHTSABER!!
Government: But seriously, you're a man. You can do what ever you want.
Government: Shut up, you sinning, freeloading hussy.
When a fic I love that hasn't updated in ages...
Me: OMIGOD YOU UPDATED.
Me: OMIGOD I LOVE YOU.
Me: BU -
Fic: Just come.
Fic: *continues it's hiatus*
Asshole: God is real and if you aren't religious then you will go to hell! MAY GOD SAVE YOU!
Asshole: God isn't real and if you believe in any of that shit you're stupid and should never breed.
Atheist: I don't believe in God, but I respect the beliefs of others.
Theist: I believe in God, but I don't mind if you don't believe in him.
Deist: I dunno man there's some shit up there what more do you want sit down eat a sandwich
robotress: SEEING SOMEONE WEARING THE COSPLAY OF YOUR FAVORITE CHARACTER: AT THE RAVE PICKING UP PREREGISTERED TICKET GETTING HIT ON BY A RANDOM COSPLAYER MEETING NEW PEOPLE GETTING INTO THE HOTEL ROOM THE DEALERS ROOM AT THE END OF THE CON PASSING BY NON-CONVENTION GOERS SEEING HORRIBLE PHOTOS TAKEN OF YOURSELF AFTERWARDS GETTING INTO THE CONVENTION CENTER SEEING A REALLY HOT...
"Don't you get tired of listening to the same song...
laugh-out-loud-johntot: Don’t you get tired of BREATHING over and over again?
During a math test
Me: my answer = 23
Answer choices: 17, 19, 26, 36.
Me: well 26 is closer to 23, so that must be the answer.